In Transition

The past few days have been hard for me.. work has been hectic and monotonous and days just going with the same routine day in and day out.. Malli will be leaving in another week which is still have been hard for me to take and my seeing my Grandmother suffering from pain though I do my utter best to make her happy and bring a smile to her face.

I dont know the meaning of life really why we are born just to suffer pain, sadness and suffering. I mean we are born giving pain to our moms we live in pain though we see some happiness which is just an illusion to keep you away from the bad thoughts and then we go giving pain and sadness to others.. whats the point of life? if this is all we are left in the end?

anyways I am moving towards being an adult now and its happening faster than I expected. I have realized the importance of spending quality time with my family which I do every weekend with seldom going out for parties and other acts of mutual pleasure. I have realized the value of money I earn and I am not being the spendthrift I used to be now spending money for the important things and to make my family members happy. I am trying my best to be a role model to my bro and sis be the elder brother they want and be the one that guides them out of darkness.. I dont think of myself anymore now cos its no use cos if then I would become a selfish person which has been a quality I have never had and never want to have.

I just wish my bro and sis realize my feelings I just wanted to spend some quality time together with them before malli goes to US but he is always out and nangi has classes last Friday I was in tears and as I told my dad about my plans and how its not working out for me why am I sooo unlucky??? A questions I just need a damn answer.. I wont be seeing my bro for 2 years after he goes next week why dont god let me spend a little bit of quality time with him before he goes?? its really sad I think I am getting a bit emotional now..

I am taking everything on a positive note and hopefully I would be able to fulfill my ambition before he leaves.. I will miss him I will badly miss him but if this happens it will take that pain away at least to a small extent.

well on a positive note... my driving has become gradually good during the past few days I have been going to classes on weekends and with the help of a good tutor I am beginning to get confident behind the wheel.. I ain't thinking about these kinda of things to much and its helping me to improve my skills even at work its working for me cos I have become a more of a relaxed person when doing things that matters with positivity and focus.

anyways its gonna be another hectic week.. work ,traveling , thoughts and experiences
life goes on as it is and as life goes on I am also moving on from being the once crazy kid with the glasses to a man who knows his responsibilities and has a clear mission to be a Success !

till next time

~Peace~

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